Don't Forget This When You Prepare Your Child For College!
Do you remember what it was like your first few days as a college freshman?
I dropped off my daughter at college two weeks ago, and as I hear her stories about how she is getting involved and finding her way, it made me think about how we prepare our kids for this moment.
There are many posts about all the things you should make sure your child knows by the time they graduate high school.
The answers often include things like the following.
How to:
> Do their own laundry
> Manage their time
> Write an email to a professor
> Manage stress
> Resolve conflicts
> Advocate for themselves
And so on.
(You might think about what you would put on this list.)
All of these things are very important.
The one thing I've never seen in any of the answers, though, is how to get acclimated during your first few weeks of college,
> when you don't know anyone
> all your regular support systems (friends, family, pets) are miles away
> you're living with a stranger (roommate) in a space much smaller than your room at home
> and maybe you haven't had to share a room before.
Not to mention how challenging some of your courses may be.
Imagine, or remember, what it's like to have to go to breakfast alone, or walk to classes alone, or not to have a trusted friend nearby who you can talk and laugh with.
Of course it can feel lonely and stressful until you meet people and feel more comfortable at school.
So, if you have a child in high school, I suggest
(1) having conversations about how they might feel when they first get to college, so they know any loneliness or stress is totally normal.
(2) discussing what might be challenging at first, how they could address it, and how they might get acclimated to their new surroundings.
Activities to get acclimated might include:
1) Walking around to get familiar with the campus
2) Getting involved in faith groups (if that applies) which are typically very welcoming to freshmen, and give you something in common with other people immediately.
3) Getting involved in campus organizations that interest you, whether it's something you've done before or something new you want to explore.
4) Engaging in a regular activity that centers you - whether it's exercising, reading, listening to music, being outside in nature, watching videos, creating art, etc.
What other support do you and your child think they might need when they first get to college?
I had these kinds of conversations with my daughter starting in her senior year of high school. I also told her she could call home whenever she wanted and we would always be there for her.
Preparing your kids in this way can make a big difference in how in control and connected they feel as they start their college journey.
What helped your child acclimate to college in the beginning?
What do you wish you had discussed with them before they left for school?
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